July 2022 – Southwest Conference Blog

Called to Love, Not to Fear 

guest post by Clara Sims, intern MID at First Congregational UCC Albuquerque

In June, churches nationwide celebrated Pride month – affirming that all people in the LGBTQ+ community are our siblings in Christ, beloved, precious, and irreplaceable members of our faith communities. However, our love and celebration this year have been set against an alarming national backdrop of increasing discrimination, hate, and violence toward our LGBTQ+ communities and, especially, toward our trans and non-binary siblings.

This national trend hit home when several faith communities learned of a local church planning to host transphobic speakers after showing the film “What is a Woman?” This film seeks to investigate the gender-fluid movement, though it does so from a decided lens of dismissal, negative bias, and fear. When such a film debuts upon this national stage of violence and fear toward LGBTQ+ communities, from the banning of medical care for transgender youth in Texas to the targeting of Pride events by militant right-wing groups, it leads me and many faith-community leaders in the greater Albuquerque area to ask different questions.

Not “what is a woman?” but “what are we afraid of?” Are we really afraid of allowing people to claim and celebrate the wholeness of their humanity? Are we really afraid of people who feel worthy enough to celebrate who they are – as God made them?

Our faith calls us to question the validity of such fear. It calls us to ask what is at stake when we choose fear over love? 

As decades of data demonstrate, people’s lives are at stake. Trans lives, non-binary lives, queer lives. Children’s lives, unborn lives – the very same the recent Supreme Court ruling to overturn Roe v. Wade claims to protect. According to the Trevor Project, an organization that provides crisis support for LGBTQ+ youth, nearly half of LGBTQ+ youth seriously considered suicide in the past year. Suicide is an epidemic among LGBTQ+ youth. When leaders, from politicians to clergy, use fear-filled rhetoric to stigmatize children and teenagers who are simply seeking to live their lives with integrity, the impact of emotional, mental, and spiritual suffering is deadly.

The Gospel offers much on the validity of fear that stigmatizes entire communities – it has no place in the kingdom of God, no place in the good news we are to proclaim to one another. We are called to love, not to fear. “There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear.” (John 4:18). 

The LGBTQ+ community are among the neighbors Jesus commanded his followers, over and over and in no uncertain terms, to love and treat with worth and dignity that the fallibility of our human judgments cannot set aside.

 As right-wing political-religious rhetoric doubles down on framing the beautiful diversity of gender and sexual identities and expressions among the LGBTQ+ community as counter to God’s will for creation, may we remember that our greatest commandment is to love one another, without criteria for who counts and who doesn’t. This will take courage and faith in the goodness of God’s community of creation; this will take risking ourselves to the blessing of a world in which everyone is needed, not as some want them to be, but as they truly are. 

Balanced

This is Conference Minister Rev. Dr. Bill Lyons’ message preached at First Christian Church UCC/DOC in Las Cruces on Sunday, July 24, 2022.

³⁸Now as they went on their way, he entered a certain village, where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. ³⁹She had a sister named Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to what he was saying. ⁴⁰But Martha was distracted by her many tasks; so she came to him and asked, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her then to help me.” ⁴¹But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things; ⁴²there is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:38-42

Martha is fussing, and Mary is listening. Martha is wrong and Mary is right. Right? Or maybe, Martha is doing what a woman is supposed to do (serving) and Mary is doing what a man is supposed to do (learning)[1] so when it comes to the cultural norms and gender expectations of their day, Mary is wrong, and Martha is right. Or maybe, Martha is attending to the needs of others, and Mary is doing something more like what the priest and Levite were doing in the story just before today’s text, focusing on things above. And in that story – the story of the Good Samaritan – someone neglecting the needs of people, especially hurting people right in front of them, in favor of focusing on things above got scolded by Jesus. And in today’s story, that response is reversed. Jesus scolds Martha who is attending to the needs of others and the honor of her house, and he commends Mary. One thing that is certain about this passage is there’s nothing simple about it! A second certainty is that the story of Mary and Martha opens a profound window for understanding the Realm of God as Jesus understood it, and as Luke and the early church tried to live it.

The Rev. Dr. Niveen Sarras is a Hebrew Bible scholar and pastor at Immanuel Lutheran Church of Wausau in Wausau, Wis. She was born and raised in Bethlehem, Palestine. About Mary and Martha she writes:

In my culture and in first-century Palestine, hospitality is about allowing the guest to share the sacredness of the family space. The women’s role is to do all of the cooking and food preparation. It is very unusual for Palestinian women to join male guests before they are done with all the food preparation. In my culture and Jesus’, failing to be a good hostess means disrespecting the guest.

The traditional interpretation of Luke 10:38-42 presents the narrative as a problem between Martha and Mary, but it is about the two kinds of ministries: diakonia and the word. Marta represents the ministry of diakonia, and Mary represents the ministry of the word. Jesus does not prefer the ministry of the latter over diakonia. Instead, Jesus does not want the diakonia to be at the expense of the ministry of the word. Both ministries are important.[2]

Luke’s point in chapter 10 is that hospitality quintessentially marks membership in the people of God. When the seventy received their mission, a community’s hospitality was the proof of participating in the Kingdom of Heaven. Hospitality defined the Samaritan as a good neighbor. And in the next chapter, Luke 11, the tell of a friend is their willingness to give you good things when you ask for them, even when doing so inconveniences or costs them.

Jesus told the story of the Good Samaritan when he met a man skilled in Biblical study who had trouble living God’s Word in relationship to his neighbors. Luke “shock[ed] [his readers] because they did not expect a Samaritan, an enemy…, to be their neighbor and succeed in what their religious leaders failed to do.” [3] In this story Jesus met a woman so busy serving others that she wasn’t listening for God’s Word.[4] Luke shock[ed] his audience again” when he welcomed Mary as a student.[5]

Recovering the symbiotic relationship between the ministry of service to a broken and hurting world and deeply listening to the words of Jesus can be a step toward healing the divisions in today’s Church and empowering us for being Kin-dom of God friends, Realm of God neighbors. Notice that “Jesus does not ask Martha to give up the ministry of diakonia; instead, he intends to relieve Martha from her anxiety and exhaustion by inviting her to join her sister in learning from him. Then, she can resume her hospitality with her sister.”[6]

These past several weeks I’ve spent a significant amount of time offering a progressive Christian witness in the public square. Listening to the stories of our neighbors about the impact of unaffordable health care and resulting medical debt has been heartbreaking. Listening to the anger and determination of young activists whose communities have been targeted by voter suppression laws has been inspiring. Crafting public statements and working on ballot initiatives in what the UCC Statement of Faith calls “the struggle for justice and peace” is exhausting! Sitting at the feet of Jesus listening deeply to his words grounds us, calms us, reminds us why we are doing ministry in the public square. Without the doing – the struggle, the risks, the solidarity with and accompaniment of our neighbors, “faith by itself, if it has no works, is dead.”^[7]

Last Saturday while moderating a webinar to inform, educate, and mobilize progressive churches for reproductive rights I heard both Rev. Dr. Cari Jackson with the Religious Coalition for Reproductive Right and Brittany Fonteno, executive director for Planned Parenthood AZ say they were engaged as Christians in the fight for abortion rights not in spite of their faith but because of it. They are women who model for me the ministry of hospitality – neighborliness, and friendship – built upon a foundation of sitting at the feet of Jesus and deeply listen.

More than that, these women are the voice of Jesus for me. The Word of God that Mary was drawn to was not written on the scrolls in her synagogue. The Word of God that engaged Mary was the Word of God embodied and the words he spoke. Balancing the tasks of hospitality with the ministry of the Word means sitting at the feet of our neighbors and listening to them too, for they have a Word from God for us told in the stories of their lives. Jesus always taught us about the Realm of God through the lens of human experience. Jesus was focused on people not issues. He always interpreted the issues of his day through the lens their impact on people’s lives. And when challenged with a decision between what his Bible said and doing the compassionate neighborly thing, Jesus always chose hospitality.

Martha, thank you for opening your home to us this morning. Mary, thank you for your calm non-anxiousness in the midst of swirling surges of busy-ness and doing. Jesus, thank you for affirming countercultural gender roles, and for reminding us that actions related to loving mercy and doing justice and spending time in your presence listening deeply are two sides of a balanced life for everyone invited to your banquet table.

“If we censure Martha too harshly, she may abandon serving all together, and if we commend Mary too profusely, she may sit there forever. There is a time to go and do, there is a time to listen and reflect. Knowing which and when is a matter of spiritual discernment. If we were to ask Jesus which example applies to us,” Martha or Mary, “his answer would probably be, “Yes.”[8]

[1] Swanson, Richard W. Provoking the Gospel of Luke: A Storyteller’s Commentary. P. 167.

[2] Sarras, Rev. Niveen. https://www.workingpreacher.org/commentaries/revised-common-lectionary/ordinary-16-3/commentary-on-luke-1038-42-5

[3] Ibid.

[4] Craddock, Fred B. Luke (Interpretation: a Biblical Commentary for Teaching and Preaching. P. 151

[5] Sarras, Rev. Niveen. https://www.workingpreacher.org/commentaries/revised-common-lectionary/ordinary-16-3/commentary-on-luke-1038-42-5

[6]Ibid.

^[7] The Holy Bible: New Revised Standard Version (Jas 2:17). (1989). Thomas Nelson Publishers.

[8] Craddock, p. 152

The Book of Joy

by Rev. Lynne Hinton

I gave new books to members of my class today. One student, a somber woman who has only recently begun to share what she has written, told me she has never owned a book. I watched how careful she was when she opened it, how she moved her fingers across the cover as if it were the hand of a child or someone she loved. Tender, grateful, surprised at how it felt.

They all treated the gifts like treasures.

We have been talking about “perspective” in these classes I teach at the substance abuse recovery center, perspective and how it matters to our joy. I am awash in ideas they have given me, moved by the words of love written in letters, our last assignment, meant to be sent from a loved one now dead. This is the perspective of wisdom, of being out and away from this world, the perspective of unconditional love, coming from the other side.

I am unable to speak after every essay because they are so profoundly beautiful and there is nothing I can say.

This work of sobriety, this hard work of feeling the forgotten feelings they have pushed down and covered up and numbed themselves to for years, the childhood trauma, abuse, neglect, prison, loss, the list goes on and on, this hard work can sometimes seem overwhelming. It is not for the weak-minded or the faint of heart.

“I’m not sure I understand joy,” one of them says. “I’m not sure I’ve ever had it.”

I struggled with the focus on joy for our writing prompts for this class. Aren’t they just trying to survive? Doesn’t joy seem like a privilege they can’t afford to imagine? Do they even think it’s attainable? These are the questions I have asked myself as we read and study the sentiments of the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu.

And it’s true that there are days when I speak of joy as a spiritual discipline, joy as being available to everyone; and I watch as their eyes glaze over and I think maybe this was an ill-planned direction to take them.

But then there’s something else that gnaws at me every time I think I should choose another topic; and that’s the thought, the bothersome thought that they don’t comprehend the concept of joy because they don’t think they deserve it. And that thought, the one from deep, deep inside the hidden reservoir of my own self-doubt, one that is a direct result of my own brokenness, causes me to weep.

So, I asked them if such a thing is possible, if there’s the slightest chance they believe they don’t deserve joy. A few looked away, eyes averted, feet slide back and forth under chairs, heads dropped. No one answered. No one confirmed or denied the possibility.

“Well, whether that is true or not,” I said. “Hear me when I say you do. Every one of you deserves to have joy.” I waited though I’m not sure exactly for what.

“You hear me?” I asked, because I needed to know.

And they looked up and they nodded, but still, they didn’t speak. But somehow, just meeting their eyes, just seeing them nod, that was enough. And with that, we carried on. We opened our new books, The Book of Joy, some of them for the very first time.

How to assess your emotional bandwidth

by Kay Klinkenborg, Church of the Palms UCC

Broad bandwidth for cell phones went to 5G in late February in this part of AZ. I just traded in an old iPhone 6, and when I looked at the bars of signal strength, there it was: 5G. Oxford Dictionary gives two definitions:

A range of frequencies within a given band that is used for transmitting a signal. The transmission capacity of a computer network or other telecommunication system.
The energy or mental capacity required to deal with a situation.

There it was…an alternative definition applicable to my life. How does one measure mental capacity required to deal with a situation? Is it IQ capacity? Is it spiritual capacity? Then we have that famous book, Emotional IQ: is it our emotional capacity? And the word “energy” was offered as an evaluative tool: what kind of energy? Emotional energy? Spiritual energy? Physical energy…am I too tired, too wired?

Quite complex, it appears. Where would you go to find your energy or mental capacity to deal with a situation? Maybe more questions bring clarity. Emotional bandwidth is the ability to honestly catch up on your emotional state.

How do you listen to yourself? Do you listen to what your mind is saying, linear thinking? Do you have a place in your body where you know something is right or wrong, called “gut feeling?” Do you identify your intuition a certain way? I can’t answer one of these questions for you. You must do the work.

So I offer a simple tool to assist us at any time to assess our “emotional bandwidth.” Using this tool helps me take a step back, see where my emotional center is and make wiser choices, possibly to wait a while for that hard conversation, get something to eat if I am hungry and ignoring that hunger edge, maybe I am overextended. Here is how to use the Emotional Bandwidth Tool.

Bandwidth 5: I am rested, refreshed, and able to focus and respond without feeling put upon, angry or testy.

Bandwidth 4: I am aware I feel somewhat irritated, that I am being bothered, but I can respond appropriately. I know I need to take a break, drink some fluids, maybe eat lunch. Space to regroup.

Bandwidth 3: I am edgy, having trouble concentrating, and don’t really want to be participating in this conversation/event. I am not actively listening, out ahead of the person talking, thinking of what I will respond. I might have a headache and not ask for the break I need to regroup.

Bandwidth 2: I am sharp in my responses, not focused, blaming others for what is happening or what I am experiencing. I am tired and ignoring it. I am over-committed and ignoring that, as well. I keep pushing, but feel like I am moving through mud.

Bandwidth 1: My mind and body are screaming: “Please, not one more request of me, I can’t even do the list I have.” I have no coping skills for emotional conversations. I really want to be left alone. In the past, I have called this place for myself “emotionally thin,” not much reserve left to give to anyone. A clear message that self-care needs to be a priority and a plan for that put into action.

So, let’s do an experiment together. Pick one or two people with whom you agree to share where you are on your Emotional Band Width Scale. Just a fun project to help you take a pause and look at your response to life. Want to be 5G…good goal. But life happens – bumps in the road – and I can’t be Pollyanna when I don’t feel that way. So being honest about my Emotional Bandwidth will benefit those with whom I interact and help me be more balanced with self-care, able to respond to support others when I pay attention.